Echoes of Scribblings

Hey guys! So I know it's been a while since y'all have seen a new post from me, but I'm finally gonna try to get back into posting more. My problem in the past is I always tried to make these super long really deep posts, but sometimes I just don't have the time to do those. So I've decided that instead of making these ridiculously long posts, I'm gonna stick to shorter, more personal, devotion-like stuff. And that's where this new series, Echoes of Scribblings, comes from. It's just gonna be a bunch of posts full of quick words of wisdom, scripture and encouragement, songs and poems I write and a bunch of random morning devotion thoughts. Hopefully these will be more manageable and I'll be able to post them more.

So without further ado, here is the first Scribbling for y'all to enjoy. This is a song I wrote a few weeks ago called "Why Not Live." This song was inspired by a lot of the struggles I went through this summer with depression and self harm. There were days when I had to take life a day at a time, and sometimes even an hour or a minute at a time cause thinking about the future was just too much. And since then one of the things that I'm constantly saying to myself is "just one more day," reminding myself that I just have to make it through right now and not to worry about whats gonna happen. I know how hard it is to struggle through these things. I know what it feels like to just wanna give up, but this song has become an anthem for me to just hold on for a little longer and I pray that it mights help you through whatever you might be going through. 

“Why not live”

Late night showers

Early hours Trying to hide the pain away 

You think I don’t see 

But what you don’t see 

Is that I’m standing right beside you now 

The tears that you cry 

I see it in your eyes

I know your barely holding on 

You put on a brave face 

You think it’s your safe space 

But no one knows the storm that’s raging inside 

            

I know it’s hard but why not 

Live one more day and rise up 

Yeah why don’t you take your shot 

Go ahead why not live 

            

All it takes is one more day 

Don’t let it all fade away 

Even if you’re not ok 

Just hold on 

Yeah hold on 

Cause tomorrow may be brighter 

Just think it could be lighter again

So why not live 

                        

You hide your pain behind long sleeves and fake greets 

You’re pretending it ended but in reality it never did

And if your honest you don’t know what you’d do if they knew 

Everything you think late covering by saying everything is great 

But in reality the pain lines everything that’s inside and outside too 

You only ever wish that they knew 

That you live as a broken mirror that your life is all smoke and mirrors 

You’re an actor, the world’s your stage 

Living life behind this face you made 

But there are cracks in your fake parade 

And I’ve seen the clefts and now I’m afraid 

Cause I realize this is my masquerade 

I’m staring at this broken mirror 

The more I look the more it gets clearer 

It’s me behind these cracks I see 

I’m staring at what’s actually me 

No holds barred I see it clearly 

This sickness yeah it nearly killed me 

And now I have to live in every moment 

Stand up tall fight and hold it 

All together 

Life gets better 

It has to wether 

Its fair I treasure 

The days the weather 

Is altogether fair 

I never go there 

Back to the tears  

I don’t even dare 

To think about where 

You found me so scared 

And gasping for air     

I couldn’t bare the burden

Pull back the curtain and see 

The scars I have aren’t free 

The price is all of me 

No 

No it’s not over yet 

Yeah my face is set 

Against the flood your my Noah’s ark 

And by your blood I have a new heart 

So god I give you my everything 

All these shards all my memories 

Take this pain 

I praise your name 

Lord your goodness 

Fills me the fullest 

And now I know that I’m not alone 

Through your love you made me a home

So now I’ll take it a day at a time 

Lord give me strength for this climb 

Out of this valley 

But until I leave 

This will be my song 

A message to be strong 

To face the pain 

To find a way 

Out of this grave 

Into your grace 

Today’s the best he gives 

So why not live 

            

All it takes is one more day 

Don’t let it all fade away 

Even if you’re not ok 

Just hold on 

Yeah hold on 

Cause tomorrow may be brighter 

Just think it could be lighter again

So why not live 

I know it’s hard but why not 

Live one more day and rise up 

Yeah why don’t you take your shot 

Go ahead why not live